10 Tips to be Absolutely F@*king Miserable

(1) Live In The Past. Even though it doesn’t actually exist anymore, dwell in it. If at all possible, repeat the mistakes you’ve made in your life over and over again in your mind. Remind yourself that no-one else makes mistakes, just you.

(2) Think About Missed Opportunities. In order to waste EVEN MORE of your time and energy, think about all the things you think you’ve missed out on, remembering to make them seem better than what they actually were. Remember that job you didn’t take, that girl you broke up with…….what if…………….

(3) The Grass IS Greener On The Other Side. Of course it is! Look at all those other people’s lives, they haven’t got their troubles or challenges, they’re perfectly peaceful and happy in every way. Try to remember this from the moment you wake up.

(4) Remember All The Times You’ve Been Mistreated. Replay these occasions over and over again in your mind. It serves absolutely purpose other than to bring a painful past event right smack into the present and experience it all over again – result!

(5) Worry About Possible Future Mistreatment. When done with step 4, move to worrying about more of the same in the future. The great thing about our minds is that they don’t know the difference between a real and an imagined event. If you want to feel like shit, create imagined scenarios in your mind that you don’t like, you don’t have to wait on it actually happening. They say a coward dies a thousand deaths – BE THAT COWARD!

(6) Focus On What’s Missing In Your Life And Don’t Be Grateful For What You Already Have. Yes, some people are starving to death in the world, some have lost loved ones in war or to disease, bla bla bla…..YOUR protein STILL hasn’t arrived from Amazon.com!!!!!

(7) Are You Beginning To Age Quickly!? Probably not but you should believe you are, after all, the worry will cause more lines and wrinkles – a self-fulfilling prophesy is just what you need.

(8) Think About Financial Ruin. Hey, there’s a credit crunch on and even if you aren’t personally affected, think about how you could be anyway….

  • I could lose my job
  • I could lose my home
  • Imagine if I was that guy who lost everything last week

Stuff like that works great!

(9) Gossip & Bitch About Others Constantly. You don’t believe in Karma – what goes around does NOT come around. Treat others like crap – relax, you’ll be the first person in history who doesn’t get their comeuppance.

(10) Believe That Your Situation Is Hopeless. Whatever it is, you CANNOT change it so don’t even try. No, no-one in the history of mankind has EVER overcome a similar situation and no-one in the whole world is prepared to lend you a hand. You’re trapped so accept it.

Practice these steps for a week and you’ll change your life!

P.S. If you’d like to be happy, just do the opposite

Article Via MuscleHack.com


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